Amazing moms have a tough job. It’s definitely not easy, and it’s not a skill they teach you in school. You basically have to learn on the job without a training manual.
While there are lots of different parenting styles, amazing moms share some personality traits that give their kids the best chance for success and happiness.
Most of us don’t automatically have ALL of these personality traits. We have to develop them. So don’t worry if some of these don’t apply to you. We’re all a work in progress.
1. Amazing Moms are Patient
You probably knew this was going to be on this list. Tiny humans are messy, noisy, don’t listen, and completely exasperating.
They can be pretty wonderful, too. But patience is essential for everyone’s survival. When your kid is being a butt, take a deep breath and be patient with them. (This is the hardest one for me.)
2. Amazing Moms are Multi-task Masters
When you have to deal with housework, food preparation, work, social life stuff, and kids, you really have to master multi-tasking. Kids will pull your focus away from literally everything. Especially when they’re babies or toddlers. For instance, I was interrupted by Toot at least once per sentence while writing this paragraph.
Multi-tasking is actually supposed to be less productive than just doing one thing at a time. So if you really want to get something done, you can’t have your kids around. If you have a toddler, you know that kids will ask a million questions, need help with ALL THE THINGS, and “watch this, Mommy!”
But everyday life demands that we multi-task everything we’re doing with the demands and needs of our children. Otherwise, we’d never get anything else done. We’d just be tending to our kids for the whole day.
3. Amazing Moms are Encouraging
Kids quickly learn to doubt themselves and worry about what other people think about them. Amazing moms are able to combat this with encouragement.
Some kids need more encouragement than others. My three-year-old is one of those kids. She is easily discouraged when she can’t do something the first time (which is most things because she’s three.) We do a lot of practicing and I help her a little less each time.
The best encouragement for these types of kids isn’t just “you can do it!” It’s actually SHOWING them they can do it.
4. Amazing Moms are Supportive
Encouragement and support go hand-in-hand. Children with support grow up to be relaxed and comfortable. Without support, the world can be a scary place. Teach your child there’s little to fear by just being there for them when they need it.
Support their choices even if it’s just as simple as an outfit choice. Support the activities they do whether it’s coloring as a toddler, soccer as a kid, or debate team as a high schooler.
Support their interests whether it’s fire trucks or bugs or even an annoying character like Peppa Pig.
5. Amazing Moms are Excellent Problem Solvers
Your kids provide a unique set of challenges that have to be solved. Every day and every hour they pose new problems.
A lot of the problems our kids cause us we proactively solve by just preparing. We pack a diaper bag with everything we’re going to need to take our baby or toddler into the wild. But if you forget the snacks, you’ve got to be ready to problem solve when your toddler starts asking for crackers.
I used to be a manager of a movie theater. The kids (literally they were 16) that worked for me would ask me what it’s like to be manager. I always told them it’s just solving one problem after another and preventing problems from happening. Being a mom is kind of similar to being a manager. Except you can’t get fired and there’s no pay!
6. Amazing Moms are Flexible
Many of your parenting attempts will fail. You have to be flexible enough to have multiple solutions up your sleeve. When something doesn’t work, you can always try something else.
Just when you get used to a stage in your kid’s life, they go and change on you. Got your baby feedings on lock? Well, now you have to add solids. Oh you’re an excellent diaper changer? Well, now you have to deal with potty breaks. Oh no, here comes preschool!
It helps if you can go with the flow.
7. Amazing Moms Have Good Leadership Skills
You might be able to boss your kids around, but they’ll resent it. And they won’t forget.
It’s more effective to have good leadership skills and only throw your parental weight around when necessary.
Lead by example and communicate your expectations clearly.
Honestly, this is another one I struggle with. Remember when I said I was a manager? Well, I wasn’t a very good one. lol
Photo by Melissa Lynn Photography
8. Amazing Moms are Dependable
Kids feel safe when they have reliable and dependable parents. They have to know that you’re there for them.
They want to know you’ll be there to help when they need it whether it’s just a hug and a kiss on their boo boo or when they’re having trouble with a friend or homework.
Photo by Melissa Lynn Photography
9. Amazing Moms are Compassionate
Kids need to develop and experience compassion. They need understanding and comforting. Can you provide those two things?
Don’t just show compassion for your child. Show your little one how to be compassionate for other people. Volunteer for charity projects. If you’re donating to a relief fund or a charity, show your children that you’re giving and explain why. (Don’t go into too much detail if the situation is grim. “People lost their houses in a fire so we are going to send them money” is fine.)
10. Amazing Moms Have a Good Sense of Humor
Your kids will give you plenty of opportunities to laugh. Especially when you don’t want to laugh because you don’t want to encourage certain behaviors.
Toot has picked up some… colorful vocabulary from her father. (Ok, she got a lot of it from me too.) But every time she drops an F bomb I just want to laugh.
You’ll keep your sanity if you have a great sense of humor. Even if you have to stifle your laughter.
11. Amazing Moms are Self Aware
Children aren’t sure how to act. It’s up to you to be a role model. You’ll find that kids react to situations in ways that mimic your reactions. They don’t know any other way. It’s important to be self-aware enough to know whether your actions and reactions are how you want your kids to react.
Have you heard the old parenting advice about how if you act like your child’s boo boo is an emergency, your child will overreact about their pain?They’re mirroring your reaction. That’s why when a kid is hurt, you’re supposed to stay calm.
It’s the same with other things. Your kids will look to you to figure out how to react to new situations. You have to be aware of yourself enough to keep your reactions in check. Which is not easy! lol
Are you Amazing?
Let me know in the comments below which of these traits you excel at and which traits you’re struggling with. We can’t all be Beyoncé, but we can try.
Being a mom is one job that requires your utmost effort and attention. Great kids usually have great parents. Being a great parent isn’t easy, but it’s easier if you work on these traits.
You can develop these attributes with practice and determination. Be the best mom you can be and enjoy the process.
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Ugh, 1 and 7 are my pain points, too. I always say I think we’re given “gifts” in life in the form of discomfort. I’m not the most patient, so the universe said here, have a wild, raging child that will pull at every last thread of you until you learn. Thanks, universe.
Lol so true